Baby seals have advocates.
Unborn babies have advocates.
The ocean has advocates.
Immigrants and Refugees have advocates.
The rainforest has advocates.
The sex and gender-confused LGBTQIA2S+ have advocates—practically every letter of the alphabet has been highjacked.
I am taking back "M."
"M" is for Men.
Men need advocates. As preposterous as that sounds, look at the facts...
Men have the highest rate of suicide [men account for 50% of the population, but 80% of the suicides].
70% of homeless people are men.
75% of murder victims are men.
93% of prisoners are men [men receive harsher punishment than women for the same crimes].
92% of work-related deaths are men.
Divorce and family courts favor women.
Churches cater to women.
Educational entities [such as public schools] systematically promote women. Since Title IX [when boys were 13 educational points ahead of women], women are now 14 educational points ahead of men [this stat holds true from kindergarten to graduate school]
Men face higher rates of addiction, depression, and deaths of despair, yet society ignores [and often mocks] a man's mental health.
Thus, I am advocating for Men. And you should, too.
For the Leader of Men [especially you pastors]
Brothers, stop demeaning men. Consciously and unconsciously, stop shaming and blaming men.
Start encouraging men. Recently, I was with a prominent denominational leader who asked me, "What immediate steps can we take to help men?" The answer was easy: "Start encouraging the men."
In our day, automation tells men that their skills are worthless. Artificial Intelligence tells men that their wisdom is valueless. Activists are telling men their gender is hopeless. And the church, with its conscious and unconscious catering to children and women, is telling men their presence is useless. Is it any surprise that men are homeless:
"Man has always lost his way: He has been a tramp ever since Eden; but he always knew, or thought he knew what he was looking for. For the first time in history he begins really to doubt the object of his wanderings on the earth. He has always lost his way; but now he has lost his address." — G.K. ChestertonStop with the dad jokes that belittle and degrade men. No more guilt-ridden Father's Day sermons that shame and disparage men. Build men up. Stop tearing them down.
When you see a man doing what God has called him to do, encourage it. Call it out. Commend him. The man leading his family into the church house on Sunday morning, put your arm around him and say, "I see you, brother. I am proud of you, and I am for you." That young college-age man walking across your parking lot on Wednesday night, bible in hand, take him by the arm and say, "I see you, and I am for you. Staying pure in a defiled world is hard, and I am proud of you."
Just start boosting men.
Also, a pro tip—every man you lead is looking for [at least] three things:
Encouragement [from other men]
Clarity [around what it means to be a man]
Community [of other, like-hearted men]
We've created SOMETHING that will help you give men what they need.
For Men in The Day-to-Day Struggle [all of us men]
Brothers, y’all are not alone. And you must never forget: the devil is a liar. The only way to beat the demonic whispers of discouragement is with truth. Deep within the recesses of our hearts are four lies:
You will never be enough.
You are a slave to your desires.
You are alone.
You are powerless to move forward.
The devil wants us to feel these lies, but he does not want us to act. As C.S. Lewis asserted, "The less you act, the less you will ever be able to act, and, in the long run, the less you will be able to feel." Believe the lie(s) long enough, and we grow powerless and numb.
How do you beat a lie? With truth. When these lies press against the recesses of your heart, stop listening to yourself and start talking to yourself:
I am accepted because the righteousness of Christ covers the guilt of sin.
I am free from bondage to sin through the power of Jesus in my life.
I am not alone but accompanied by the Counselor, the Spirit of God.
I am in command with the freedom to resist and expel the powers of darkness.
As needed, seek practical help [see below].
Indigenous tribes. Arctic wolves. The atmosphere. Everyone and everything seems to be getting a lifeline. It’s time we throw one to the men. It’s time we start advocating for men.
Chief Advocate,
—Harp
This post originally appeared on Chris Harper's personal blog, Good Trouble.